In last few days few things at my married-life-issue turned out on different note and though I am pretty much positive about them, yet sometimes I have my own doubts on her motives. I really don't want to go back to my darn story of life again but than... I can't even ignore it completely.
So what happened few days back, she started replying back on my emails and sure it is a good sign. She says that she want to talk to me. (hey.. are you still asking the question - who is 'she'? guess not.. I am talking about my wife). Hmm... that is pretty positive sign, we should talk then only issues get resolved. I replied back with lot of questions and hoped that she will reply back, but she did not. I almost forgot that in past too, her brother used to chat from her chat ID and this time too he might be playing the same card again. What is she/her brother is up to?? are they trying to build base for another case, like this person is harassing me over mail?? or trying to use these casual mails as evidence in existing cases? I don't know.
One thing is sure, she is still not ready to resolve it. Otherwise after our mail conversation, she could have turned up in the court at least and might have said a 'hello' to me. (or I might have got a chance to start conversation on some similar note.
Instead, her brother was giving me 'free advice' that I should obey their wish as command, I still have time and we (me and her sister) should live together again. Sure there was a big undertone of something else than advice.I think that advice was more suitable to his sister, after all she is the one who abandoned me and ran away.
Later her elder brother tried hard to say some real harsh things on the group mail. Earlier I did not notice, but now when I see all these things in a sequence, I smell a rat.
Sure, this blog is not here for me complaining about my life, but I am just voicing my thoughts. I have tried to keep that cribbing thing on the back seat, now I only evaluate perspectives of what is going on. After all most of the things in the life seems to be back on track and this issue of failed-marriage is nothing more than a regular obstacle. I have learnt mostly to live with it.
I don't see any reason why I should not enjoy my life the way it is. If it is hard than I am harder.
Of late, I found less creative time to write any poem. Though I am not a poet but sure it gives me a new channel to express myself. Interestingly I found that I just can't write in a regular fashion, it has it's own high time and a swing in mood when words starts taking shape of a poem. Again, I am not binding myself to any rule that I have to write a poem every week or so, hence, I have no regrets and I will wait whenever next comes out of me. Sure I enjoy writing something which I myself can read back again and when I get hands on it, sure it will be published here too.
Next, are my small trips, usually not more than 4-6 hours. I am on one, almost every weekend these days. Sure that is another one way for me to enjoy myself. Again one is up ahead coming weekend. My new friends are very cooperative and go out with me most of the time. Sometimes I do go alone too, not because I am forced for it but just that I love being with myself too.
There is a lot happening these days and I am taking it with open arms. I want to write about all, but time is not permitting me for that. I have to stop here, But sure you can always drop a mail, chat, call anything to me and warm welcome and reply will be there.
cheers,
:-)
